Change. Miracles. Provision.

I don't even know how to begin this blog post. If you follow me on social media, you probably will have already heard / read all of this. But this is the latest in the story of my life. 

On May 4th (NOT May 5th), I will be donating a kidney to my Mom. This is something that has been in the works for years. I started getting tests done in 2015, and I was cleared for everything to happen last Summer. But as you know, I went to Guatemala last Summer, because that is not when God wanted Mom to get her kidney. God wanted her to get her kidney now. In just about two weeks. In May of 2017. After I have finished my undergraduate degree. 

That's what is also crazy. Today I write my last exam of my undergrad. I cannot even believe it. It feels like just yesterday I started at Trent University, but it was almost four years ago now. So weird. 

Anyway, so 2017 is just insane. At the youth New Years Eve Eve all nighter back in 2016, we came up with words that we felt would define our 2017 year. So many students reflected that 2016 was a terrible year for them, and they proclaimed that 2017 would be better. I thought about this for awhile, and I came up with three words that I wanted to define and claim for my year. 

Change. 

Miracles. 

Provision. 

Right away in January, everything changed for me. At the beginning of my fourth year, I got this awesome job as the executive assistant of the student association. I loved this job; I got to spend time every day with my best friend, do work that was totally up my alley, and participate in tons of cool event planning. Plus admin stuff, cleaning, organizing, leading, customer service, etc. It was awesome. Then, in January, it was taken from me. With no warning. I was fired from a job that I loved. I was fired by a man who spread lies about me, and who treated others so unfairly. It was really hard. It was a big change. Also in January, I experienced the death of a friend that I had known well in high school. It was an incredibly tough thing to go through. So many emotions and so many wrestling matches with God. There was so much change, so much happening that was not part of anyone's plans. Things that were in place for me, things that I had planned and expected, all of a sudden weren't there anymore. Especially with work. I had planned and expected to have that income for the rest of the school year, and all of a sudden it was gone. 

Anyway, the months after that, I was still seeing change. But I also began to see miracles and provision. All three of these words (Change, Miracles & Provision) have already defined this year and it's only April. 

I mentioned some big changes in regards to school and friends, but another change for me so far, is style of surgery that I will be having for the kidney transplant. This change was made due to a variety of reasons, but ultimately it was God who made this change for me. I am going to be having laparoscopic surgery, which is not what I wanted all along. But God knows what is best for me, and that is what is happening. Another big change. 

And miracles. It is a miracle that my Mom and I are an exact match so that I can donate a kidney. We are an exact match down to our antibodies. That does not happen. That is unheard of. But it's true. And it's all because of God. There have been so many tiny miracles along the way, too. We are a match and we have been preparing for surgery for years, but my Mom has not needed to go on dialysis once. That is a miracle. She will get a brand new healthy kidney, without ever having to experience the pain and discomfort of dialysis. That is a miracle, and a direct answer to prayer. 

And provision. God has been providing for me ever since I lost my job. I did not expect to have no income these months leading to surgery. I have bills to pay. I can't guarantee what I can do post-opt. I know I won't really be able to work a normal job; yet I some how have to pay for school. But God has been providing. I nannied for a family in 2015, and in January they asked me to start coming regularly to babysit. This has been God's way of providing me with some money to get by, to pay those bills, and to save a little for school. It's been tough, but He has provided. And on top of my own things, God has been providing for our family financially. There has already been people who have blessed us with some money to help us with this next season we are about to go through. My Mom will not be working, and my Dad will not be working to the same capacity as he would like, either. 

And this is all just in past tense. This year is really only just starting. There is going to be more changes; I am graduating university, I am going to teacher's college, I am losing a working organ. That's a lot of changes in one year. We also are having the surgery soon; so more miracles will be coming in that regard too. I believe it. I believe we will heal quickly, and God will give us strength. Our story will be full of God's glory and all for His glory. And God will continue to provide and give us provision. I know that for me, a job will come. I know that some how, we will still be able to pay our bills and eat three meals a day, even when we won't be working. 

I know all this, because He has already shown us what He can do. We will call on the miracles that He has already done. We will remember those, and claim them for ourselves again and again. We know changes will come, but He will be with us through them. And I know He will provide financially, because He cares for the birds of the air and the flowers in the ground, so He will care for us too. 

We are ready for anything, 
In omnia paratus 

I have been blogging some real & raw, unstructured & unplanned thoughts over on another blog. That is where I have been writing day to day as I go through this year, and where I will be writing about this next season. If you so wish to read these, feel free to send me a private message and I can send you a link.