i remember it like it was yesterday. i was in grade 10 on lunch when i got the call that my dad was being transported to Toronto General hospital. we didn't know what was wrong. the doctors in Oshawa didn't know. no one knew. but there were suspicions, was it a stroke? was it the onset of MS? the signs were weakness, muscle loss, extreme pain, tiredness, the list went on.
on April 8th 2011 my dad was admitted to Toronto General hospital following a spinal tap that revealed he had Guilliain-Barré Syndrome. (i will never be able to fully understand and define what this disease is. but it basically is your own immune system attacking the coating on your nerves, leaving them without that protective casing, thus causing extreme pain, muscle weakness, etc) he remained there for two weeks straight receiving treatment that was made especially for him. GBS is rare, affecting only 1-2 / 200,000 people a year. we had never heard of it before and the doctors were very enthralled with my dad. the student doctors were getting a real life opportunity to study a person with this rare disease. anyway, my mother remained by his side in the hospital for the first week without leaving and my brother and i stayed with our grandparents.
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| the first time visiting him in the hospital |
with GBS, it usually strikes once, you don't see it coming, you sometimes will never be able to pin point what triggered it, but it almost always is recoverable. if you catch it in time, you can get the treatment you need and be fully recovered 4 weeks to a year later. however, in my dad's case, it was not caught as early as it should have been. he was in the hospital for two weeks and then had to go to rehab to learn how to use his muscles all over again. he had lost all his muscle mass, as well as a lot of other weight from being in bed for so long. he looked awful and it was heartbreaking to see my strong, protective dad like that.
after he was in rehab for about a week or two, he came home. he was never 100% but he was better than he had been at the beginning. then, with no notice, he relapsed. the entire process began again. he couldn't walk, he was in extreme pain, his muscles were not working. he had to go back to the ER and spend another week in the hospital undergoing treatment. right away, we were told this is rare for it to happen again. but that this could be it, after this he should be good and it shouldn't happen again. what we didn't know was that his condition was to become chronic.
my dad went in and out of the hospital and rehab that whole year. doctors and neurologists then determined that my dad no longer had just GBS but that he has CIPD (chronic inflammatory demyelinating polyradiculoneneuropathy). even more rare than GBS, CIPD only affects 1-2 / one million people. CIPD is basically chronic GBS and means this relapsing will never stop happening and we have to do something about it. so, to this day my dad goes for regular treatments. the treatments are what brings him to a level that allows him to go about his life in the best way he can. he can function, but since that day three years ago, he has never been 100% and he never will be. the treatments every 6-9 weeks are what prevent the entire relapse from happening again, but the treatments themselves wipe out my dad for three days alone before they even begin to kick in.
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| visiting my dad in rehab, with my brother |
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| in sickness and in health |
but through this entire process and this specific journey & roller coaster ride that my family has been on, God has been faithful. when my dad was in the hospital the first time, he was unable to work and my mother was not working either. my dad never was able to work at full capacity again and my mom lost her job all together. but, we never lost hope and trust in God. we knew that He would provide for us. our family never went without a meal. we never went without paying a bill. we never went without. even at Christmas time when we didn't have money for presents and just were glad to be spending it together, anonymous people from our church donated presents for us to open on Christmas morning along with food and money. it was the biggest blessing. literally, we were blessed from so many people from all over the place. it was incredible and the only reason we are all here and all okay is because of God's favor in our lives.
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| optimism is definitely key |
i learned a lot through this journey, i dealt with so many feelings from depression, anger, resentment, confusion, pain. but through those feelings, God made me a better person. after all i have seen and been through, i know that i am only here because of Him. i never go a day without thanking Him for all He has done. my dad is the strongest person i know. he has taught me and shown me by example a lot about what i want in a man. even though my father is not 100%, is always tired and in pain, he still makes an effort to get up everyday, go to work, and do something with his life. through all his hospital stays and rehabilitation, he never lost his faith and never turned on God. i believe that is why God has blessed us so much. because, through any situation, He can make things good. my dad was able to witness to countless people wherever he went. nurses, doctors, fellow patients, all who looked at him with pity at one point or another, my dad was able to share with them about the King and strong God that was on his side. and that he would be okay because he had Jesus right there with him.
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| my rock right here, love him |
our journey is not done, life is still moving, God is still working. but we are ready for anything.
In omnia paratus
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